Life Lessons Learnt from being a SIngle Dad.
“It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for – and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing. It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool – for love – for your dreams – for the adventure of being alive”
Oriah Mountain Dreamer
There are a couple of undeniable truths that I know about myself:
I am a gypsy
I see life as an adventure
I am an eternal kid
I want to share the journey with a like-minded partner
I will take calculated risks to provide this life for me and my kids
These truths above I see as positive, but there are a couple of other’s that make some of the above seem almost untenable:
I am totally an acquired taste
I am emotional
I love people, but when I reach my fill, and need alone time.
I am EFNP personality type. We only make up 7% of the population and are almost a mix of contradictions in a lot of ways! (You can read about it here and maybe check out what your personality type is http://www.16personalities.com/enfp-personality)
I see life as one HUGE learning experience. I live from my gut, wear my emotions on my sleeve. I try to take my head out of my life decisions, as I am instinctual, and try to use my brain as a confirmer rather than a ruler.
I try to teach my kids to take chances, dare to dream and provide them with experiences rather than items. I try to set that example for them by doing that myself. I am extremely proud of my kids.
This past week has been a HUGE learning and growth experience. I turned a year older, I packed up my house and moved from a place I have resided for 15 years. It signified a start of a new life. I offended people, acted like a jack ass, was over emotional and kind of lost the plot for the first time in a LONG time! Clearly the knucklehead gene is still active in this old body!
But you know what, it was good! I learnt and grew from it. Mistakes are only mistakes if you don’t learn from them. I look at them as teachable moments!
I am so psyched on my next part of my life…excited for what it will bring, and want to share that journey with others, but you know what, the journey is not going to mean squat unless I have the courage to do it by myself.
I love being surrounded by people. I know I want to share my life with someone. One thing that divorce has taught me is to rely upon myself. You have to. As a single parent you have to be on top of your stuff, but it also teaches you that you don’t have to have a partner as a crutch….as someone to hold your hand. That you have to rely upon yourself, have confidence in yourself, and love yourself first before you want to bring anyone into that space.
It’s taught me to trust in the universe. I know now when things are supposed to happen, they will. You just can’t rush good things……they take time……no matter how much you want them. It’s definitely taught me that you don’t live life, it lives you, and you just have to hang on for the ride and fully embrace it.
I have been taught to live in the moment. You can’t change the past, you can’t manipulate the future. If your mind and heart are focused on that, you miss what is going on right now. You will miss the adventure that life is.
It has taught me that without pain, there is not love, without mistakes there is not growth, without passion there is not life….existence maybe….but not life!
Most importantly, life’s journey has, for the most part, been as fun as hell, and it keeps getting better. Life is all about growth, all about being the best YOU you can be, and having a positive effect on the world. It’s about loving those around you, it’s about pain, sorrow, tragedy, laughter, friendship, love and fun.
Never give up, don’t waste a minute, learn from everything, live 100% and don’t be scared to try. Learn to love yourself, to trust yourself, feel comfortable being alone and don’t be scared to follow your life’s path by yourself…..I have total confidence not only for me, but for everyone, things will just fall into place!
